NEW  ZEALAND
FO LK * SONG

Big Bad Don

Doug Catley
c.1965

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With his legendary goal-kicking ability, his running and his defensive skills, fullback giant Don Clarke won many games for the All Blacks.


Big Don, Big Don
For years at the park you could see him arrive
Stood six foot one, weighed two forty-five
Kind of broad at the shoulder and his thighs were thick
And everybody knew that this fella could kick
Big Don.
Big Don, Big Don
Big bad Don.

Mm Mm, Big Don, Mm Mm, Big Don
Everybody knew where Don called home
Back in Morrinsville county where he loved to roam
With his big brother Ian and the rest of the clan
Kickin' a ball 'round green grazing land
Big Don.

After ten years rugby and many, many Tests
And the crowd not thinkin' he was playing his best
He decided to retire and head back home
When the chairman of selectors got him on the phone:
He said "Don - "

Big Don, Big Don
Big bad Don.

He said "Don, big man, just wha'da'ya say
There are three Tests drawn and one more to play
Take down y' boots off that lofty nail."
But everybody knew it was the end of the trail
For big Don.

So he played his last Test that cold wet day
And all aroun' the ground you could hear'em say
"The guy's too big, too heavy, too slow,
He'll lose us the game, he'll have to go
Big Don.

Big Don, Big Don
Big bad Don.

Mm Mm, Big Don, Mm Mm, Big Don
But with thirty seconds left and the score nil-all
The opposing fly-half broke through with the ball
Dropped and kicked just right for the corner
A flash of jersies and three wing-three quarters
Raced down the field with their ears pinned back
And the crowd went wild and yelled "Black, Black, Black,
Where's Don?"

Then out of the blue in front of the stand
Big Don leaped high, had the ball in his hand,
Turned and faced the opposing side
And with a mighty right boot he thrashed that hide
And forty-five thousand swallowed their pride
When he potted a goal from his own twenty-five
Big Don
Big Don, Big Don
Big bad Don

Mm Mm, Big Don, Mm Mm, Big Don
And while the players exchanged their clothes
The man behind the mike arose
And said in a voice that everyone knows
"Now the lager here's New Zealand's greatest beer, I suppose"
Big Don
Big Don, Big Don
Big bad Don.
Mm Mm, Big Don, Mm Mm, Big Don.

Big Bad Don on record

45 rpm. ; 7 inch disk, His Master's Voice, Wellington, N.Z. HR.209

A side
Big Bad Don, performed by Doug Catley with The Fernleafs.

B side
What's on in the Park, performed by Mick Dawson with The Fernleafs.
Both songs arranged and conducted by Laurie Lewis.

Our thanks to Don and Mary Basher of Taumarunui for lending us their copy of this historic recording.

Don Clarke

Born: November 10, 1933 at Pihama, Taranaki.
Died: December 29, 2002 at Johannesburg
Physical: 1.88m, 110kg
Position: Fullback
Province: Waikato
Test points: 207 points (2 tries, 32 conversions, 38 penalties, 5 dropped goals)

Big for a child, he was considered too large to play age-grade rugby at primary school. Played for his local under-18 club side at the age of 12, before making his first class debut for Waikato in 1951 at 17.

He made his international debut against South Africa in 1956 and surprised touring Springboks with not only his kicking prowess but also running and defensive skills.

Clarke, known appropriately as "The Boot," was the scourge of the Springboks, Lions and Wallabies teams: when he retired in 1965, he had set several points-scoring records which it was predicted would never be broken.

He had scored 1851 points in first class rugby (in 226 matches), 781 for New Zealand (in 89 matches between 1956-64) and 207 in Tests, all records that have been gradually eclipsed.

Then there were his individual triumphs, such as the First Test against the 1959 Lions when his six penalties won the Test for the All Blacks, and heading of the Sports Post that night read LIONS 17 - CLARKE 18.

Or his incredible total of 163 points on the 1957 tour of Australia. Or the day he landed a 77-metre goal at Te Kuiti.

Or his match-winning conversion against France at Athletic Park in 1961, kicked into a galeforce wind, which people still talk about.

But the most satisfying family occasion was in 1961 when he and his four brothers played alongside each other in the Waikato provincial team against Thames Valley.

LIONS 17 - CLARKE 18

Carisbrook, 1959. All Black first-five Ross Brown had a close-up view of what remains one of the greatest goal-kicking displays in rugby history, when fullback Don Clarke kicked the All Blacks to a 18-17 victory in the first Test against a star-studded British Lions outfit, despite their opponents scoring four tries to nil.


"He put three of those penalties over from right on the sideline from 45 or even 50m, one from straight in front and another two from 40m or more. His timing was absolutely sensational. I've never seen anything like it in my life. It was freakish. The ball was caked in mud... DB wiped a bit off but it was still heavy as hell; yet when he kicked the thing, it damn near flew right out of the park."

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Published on internet 7th Jan 2003